friends (but maybe i wanted more?)
by shinkuraita
Summary: Looking over to her blonde teammate briefly after a training session one day, mouth opening slightly in preparation to tease him about something she couldn't remember, she froze as an indescribable feeling she'd never experienced before coursed through her body.


**_hello! I haven't posted a fic online in so long, but as i recently finished this and am pretty proud of myself for it, i decided to post it here- as a start. I've posted a fic on here before, but I think I've improved a lot since then. I hope you enjoy this! It was really fun to write. I kind of set it up for a part two, but I'm not sure if I should.. be sure to let me know! I also plan to post more borusara fics in the future!_**

* * *

_Smiling down at some dumb text he sent her that made her laugh- she let herself love him completely, and even if it was just a brief moment of self acceptance that was gone as soon as it arrived, it __still terrified her._

* * *

Looking over to her blonde teammate briefly after a training session one day, mouth opening slightly in preparation to tease him about something she couldn't remember, she froze as an indescribable feeling she'd never experienced before coursed through her body.

She'd known Boruto her whole life, and for the first time in their sixteen years of friendship- her thoughts when she heard his name traveled far beyond how annoying and how much of an idiot he could be most times. Knocks on her balcony door at midnight and being coerced into eating at Thunder Burger every week no longer made her roll her eyes. His smug grin that she usually despised now was something that she thought about more than she cared to admit.

His flirty jokes and stupid pick up lines that she never paid much attention to now had the ability to make her blush- which he found amusing. He had a habit of looking into her eyes when she spoke and to feel like the most important person in the world to him in that moment was a sensation she wasn't sure she could handle.

She found herself wanting to be around him more, and didn't know why. Getting injured during a mission and rendered unable to communicate with her team just made her think about how angry he'd be with himself for not being there, and wonder more about his safety then her own.

At first, she refused to accept it. There was no way she liked Boruto, no way in hell. She'd never felt this way before, and to have these feelings for the first time towards her teammate of all people was beyond weird. What was going on with her?

After countless sleepless nights, and tons of thinking- she concludes that she does indeed like him. And she's not very happy about it.

Sarada realized that she'd felt this way long before that day on the training fields, long before she understood what any of this meant. Smiling down at some dumb text he sent her that made her laugh- she let herself love him completely, and even if it was just a fleeting moment of self acceptance, it still terrified her.

Okay. So she was in love with him. But what now? What was she supposed to do with this information?

The more her attraction to him grew, the more time she spent over-analyzing, hoping that he felt the same, asking herself 'what if?'. Just as soon as she thought she'd accepted that he would never see her as anything but a friend, he'd smile at her, listen intently when she had to vent- giving her a long hug because most times that's all she needed. An innocent brush of hands, laying his head against her shoulder and in her lap without a second thought.

This just wasn't good for her psyche.

They'd been on one of their many Thunder Burger 'dates' after a spar, and he had a different look in his eyes. She was sure she'd seen it all on him- yet here he was, sitting across from her yet he seemed to be somewhere else internally. She doesn't ask him about it- waiting patiently for him to tell her what was up like always. He excitedly tells her about a girl he met and how much he likes her. She can almost hear her heart crack. The way he smiles as he talks about her was more than enough to show her how smitten he was.

The longer he goes on, the more her heart breaks into pieces. They had always told each other everything-it wouldn't be shocking for him to tell her this, yet it still hurt her to hear. Sarada discreetly made up an excuse to leave and went home, tears already running down her face before she reached her room.

Her mother found her enveloped in blankets, sniffling and shaking because she had no more tears. She felt betrayed, angry with him even if she knew that he didn't mean to hurt her. Her mind couldn't help but travel to the worst places- Boruto would date this girl, she'd be forced to meet her and smile like it wasn't painful. He would hold her hand, kiss her in public.

She refused to tell her what had made her so upset, but she had a pretty good idea of what could've happened. She stroked her dark hair. Sakura knew all the tell-tale signs of a broken heart-after all, she'd been in her exact position, in love with someone who seemingly didn't feel the same.

Before she knew it, they'd get married, have a baby-maybe two. Sarada would become an aunt.

How was she supposed to get over someone she'd never been with in the first place?

She didn't know.

Boruto's midnight visits to her balcony occurred less and less, and a part of her was relieved. He was suddenly always busy, and her jealousy gets the best of her. She purposely went to the training fields when she knew he wouldn't be there, and always conveniently had excuses not to go to Thunder Burger with him. He looks at her with concerned eyes- but she can't see him.

She sees them together one day, and all the feelings she hoped were gone floated back up to the surface again. The girl was beautiful, just the type of girl he'd fall for. He had his arm around her, and she was resting on his shoulder- laughing over something Sarada couldn't hear.

Boruto turns his head and gives her a quick peck, obviously not aware of Sarada's presence. She can feel tears well up again, and she quickly leaves- not wanting to see a second more of the two.

Sarada found herself blowing off steam on the training fields- the only way she knew how to. When things with her family went to shit, she trained. When she got into a big argument with ChoCho, she trained. So when she was stuck with these feelings for her teammate that she had no idea what to do with, she trained.

She threw another kunai, then another, and another, not even one of them missed. It didn't make her feel better.

Unknown to her at the time, the one who'd been living in her head rent free had masked his chakra- and quietly watched her from the trees. He was going to figure out what was going on with the Uchiha.

* * *

Sarada wakes up to a knock on her balcony door. She contemplated ignoring it, until he knocks again, the sound of his voice softly calling her name muffled through the glass. She gets up and pushes the sliding door open. She forces a smile, but he's known her long enough to tell when she wasn't being genuine.

Sarada can feel the tension between them. Besides missions and casual hey's around the village, she hasn't talked with him in forever. He smiles back at her- commenting on how he hasn't been on her balcony to talk in a while. She agrees, feeling inclined to ask if he wants to come inside her room.

It felt weird to keep secrets from him. He was her best friend, nothing was an off-limits topic for them. The word 'personal' didn't exist. She'd told him countless things she would never dare tell anyone else, him the same. So why couldn't she tell him the truth before this had all happened, that she had feelings for him that weren't going away?

Boruto says he's fine. He wastes no time, asking her why she'd been so distant lately.

She isn't prepared to answer this question. She obviously can't tell him, even if she wanted to. The last thing she wanted was to put him in an awkward situation. Sarada avoids his eyes, fumbling with the bottom of her shirt. She finally says that she can't say, and that it's..personal. At least that wasn't a lie.

He looks away from her, leaning over the balcony with a sigh.

"At first I thought you were just going through something with your family again, or ChoCho, until I realized that you were avoiding me directly." He doesn't sound angry with her, or disappointed, just tired and frustrated- and for her, that was far worse than having him be upset.

"What's going on, Sara? If I messed up and acted like an ass, then it'd be nice if you could tell me, you know? You're my best friend, and I feel like I'm losing you.. and it sucks."

The knot in her stomach tightens. Wow, when had she become such a bitch? Sarada acted selfishly, too busy thinking about herself and her own feelings to consider how she'd been treating him. Everything he'd done was innocent, and he never meant to hurt her or make her cry.

"Boruto.." She whispered, feeling her eyes water but she forced herself not to cry. She'd done enough of that, now it was time to fix the mess that she'd created.

Sarada placed her hand on his arm, causing him to look at her again. "You're not losing me, I promise. You didn't do anything. It's all me. I'm so sorry, Boruto."

His blue eyes softened at her apology, showing her that smile that she loved so much. "I'm relieved, I don't know what I would do without my favorite Uchiha."

All she can manage is a shy grin, still feeling guilty about her actions. It didn't help that he'd called her his 'favorite uchiha', which made her blush. She moves her hand down his arm, resting it gently on top of his. There's a silence between them for a long moment, but neither of them mind.

"The feeling's mutual. I really don't know what I'd do without my second favorite Uzumaki."

Boruto makes a face, and she can't help but giggle. It felt good to act like this with him again.

They talked for a while longer before she commented on how late it was, and then they said their goodbyes and he left her there on the balcony. After their interaction that night, Sarada came to a conclusion.

When she looks into his eyes, says hello to him at the gate the morning before leaving for a mission, or listens to him gush about his girlfriend (who was a sweetheart sarada could never bring herself to dislike), her heart still aches for him but she wants to see him happy-even if that means him being happy with someone else.

Spending her nights thinking of him became spending her nights reading a new book series. She started cooking more, she pondered with the idea of a new look, she let herself be dragged to the mall by ChoCho for the first time in forever. That's not to say she's over him completely, but she's accepted that he'll never like her in the way she wants him to-and she's okay with that.

Nevertheless, a part of her will always love him, and that's something she's sure will never change.

Boruto is actually early to their meet-up spot at the gate for once. His eyes can barely stay open, and he's leaning against a wall half asleep as Sarada comes walking up. She smiles tiredly, greeting him and saying good morning like she always does- yet something's different this time. Her voice is as smooth as velvet, and the way she smiles does something to his heart.

Suddenly, he's wide awake.

* * *

(sigh… here we go again)


End file.
